The problem with self-optimization

At a time when self-optimization is preached and praised everywhere, I would like to share a little thought of my own. I am well aware that most of us have some character traits that are not worth keeping. However, in my opinion, the problem is that we don't stop when we've reached a good point. Everything has to be optimized even better, even faster, even better. However, this can make you feel worse after all this optimization than before.

This is because the more we concentrate on optimizing, the more we actually focus on what is wrong with us. Characteristics that we have had all our lives and which are not really bothersome in and of themselves are now criticized in the strongest possible terms. However, in very few cases does this self-criticism result in our self-optimization really being optimized.

Another problem is that it can be incredibly difficult to optimize yourself. I don't mean this from the point of view that we lack motivation and discipline, but that we ourselves don't have the necessary Know-How to optimize ourselves. Ideally, someone who has been trained in these areas, such as a therapist, can help us, even if I don't like this term, Life coach.

The risks when we set off on our own and without careful consideration can be wonderfully described metaphorically as follows:

Imagine we are holding a ball of wool in our hands. Instead of taking a closer look at it, we start pulling wildly at the various threads. Here and there, we manage to work out the individual strands of wool, but knots also tighten everywhere. Knots that we could have undone effortlessly if only we had been a little more careful. However, we now have the problem that we have to approach the matter with much more sensitivity than would have been the case originally. Or we have to ask someone else for help, someone who has learned how to unknot balls of wool properly.

I hope that this metaphor and this brief input has helped you to recognize the problem of permanent self-optimization. If you have similar views or a completely different opinion, please share them with us in the comments.