It is usually the times when we are far from well that we realize we need to do something different. Then, when we have managed to change our situation, we have made it out of a bad situation. For this reason, it is all the more praiseworthy when we have made it.
If we built our own heaven, then we were in another place before that. That place, if it was not heaven, was a hell. A hell may seem a bit of an exaggeration here, but it was at least a place that caused us suffering. It made us tired of life, or at least frustrated us on the whole.
First, we must realize that our situation is not good for us in order to change it. But realizing is, as we know, only the first step on the road to improvement. The second step is much more difficult, we have to take the initiative and start to change something about our situation. But where to start? After all, the number of ways we can improve our current situation seems endless.
This endless selection of possible approaches can be paralyzing. Where to begin? The most important thing is, that we start, where doesn't matter most of the time. Every small step is a step towards heaven. Finally also begins a journey of thousands of miles with the first stepas Lao Tzu once said. Even though we will fail many times, it is important to try anyway. Because our own hell is definitely not a place we want to stay in for long. A place we know is not good for us is all the worse for us if we knowingly dwell in it. Because knowing something is not good for us, but also not changing anything about it undermines self-confidence. "Why am I not changing anything about my situation?" or "Why am I not strong or smart enough to change something about this?" are just two exemplary questions that can plague our minds in such situations.
How we build our own hells, why this is even worse than you might think at first glance, and what we can do about it is something you can here read up.
Of course, this sounds very frustrating at first, but it can also be very motivating. You have to be willing to be a fool to change something. The saying "No master has ever fallen from the sky" is there for a reason. You have to be willing to try again and again, to stand up once more than you have fallen.
Then, when we have made it out of hell and are building our heaven piece by piece. We can be all the more proud of what we build. We must leave behind the dead state of hell and aim for a more living lifestyle. As Alan Watts said, we can only do this by A changewhich we ourselves must bring about. Even though it may not look like much to outsiders, it is our own actions that have brought us there. It doesn't help to compare ourselves with others in terms of what they have achieved or where they are in life.
When we finally build our heaven, it is important to remember that we found the strength to do so in our own hell. We found the strength at a moment when one could just as easily have given up. One could have been paralyzed by the sheer number of possible changes or, each time there was a setback, given up again. But you persevered. You didn't give up until you changed something about your situation. It is important to keep this in mind.